I'm so cross with myself!!

I'm doing it again - just when I get to a point where it is all working beautifully and I'm execrcising and making good food choices, a little voice in my head says "Stuff it, just have.... or just don't worry about the exercise today". It's self-sabotage! I really need to work out why my brain thinks there are more advantages in staying fat than in losing it all.

I know I use the fat to hide behind sometimes. I'm quite shy and not always comfortable in social situations and I like the cloak of invisibility fat can shroud you in. I also know that when I lost weight last time and got down to just a bit above what I am now, I didn't know how to respond to people as they started to treat me differently, but this time I thought I had sussed that out.

I'm SO CROSS with myself uuggghhhhh!!!!!!!!

posted under |


Chris said...

Oh hun , its only you that matters , look at yourself in the mirror , and believe. You are doing this for yourself,if other people support you,thats great,if they are indifferent thats their loss!
Your confidence will soar as you travel along your weightloss journey.

RLKenne said...

I do it too! As soon as I start to get a little confidence back and feel a bit better about myself (usually after losing 2 stone) my brain tells me to quit and of course, in the past I have done and ended up putting all the weight back on. However, this time is different. Why? Because I want it to be. And yes, there is a certain level of comfort involved in being fat, a certain level of safety. People know me fat, accept me fat and I can eat whatever I want. People have no expectations of me when I'm fat. I'm not expected to exercise or fit into a bikini or eat salads everyday. Losing weight is different, people do have expectations and I have expectations. However, THIS is my journey and I will travel my way. Don't be cross with yourself today, LEARN from yourself today and add these observations about yourself into the wealth of knowledge you already have and use it to empower you and spur you on rather than to give up. MAKE THIS TIME BE DIFFERENT! You CAN do this. Good luck!

I hope you don't mind me posting.

Bex - WW member (5+ Boards - RKenne)
Weight Loss: 36.5lbs in 19 weeks. (98lbs to go!!)

Jackie said...

Thanks Chris and Bex, you both make a lot of sense. I guess it's just frustration. Still, today is a new day and I'm just going to take it from here. Thank you x

milkywaystar said...

Hi Jackie
don't give up you are doing fantatics. Any tips for a cereal dieter. At ww for the long road but weight loss is slow.

Jackie said...

Hi Christine,
I guess it's just about getting your head in the right place. I've tried to lose weight loads of time in the past and was sort of successful a couple of times, but never as successful as this time. I don't know why the weight is coming off so well, except I have really done more exercise than I have ever done before. The weeks I don't do any I notice a real drop (eg. last week I walked loadss and did exercise on my wi fit as well as using light weights and I lost 3.5 lbs. This week I've done hardly any and I've lost 1.5lbs. Still not bad, but it probably would have been better if I had exercised more.

Keep at it - you can do it :)

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