I only lost half a pound this week, but I have to say that I am actually pleased with that. After a great start to the week, it all went down hill on Wednesday. I haven't been sleeping very well (I suffer from insomnia and when I am on school holidays my sleeping pattern becomes dreadful) and that really affected me and the decisions I made on Wednesday. I just couldn't be bothered and made some very bad food choices. I felt really resentful about dieting and focused on the fact that I feel really good now and so it didn't matter if I stopped losing weight and instead maintained. Deep down I knew it was just tiredness that was talking and that I wasn't being totally rational.

Now it would have been okay, except on Thursday I did exactly the same thing again. On Thursday I got Pizza delivered and ate a whole one to myself. The only saving grace was that in the "bad old days" I would have had a large pizza with garlic bread and chicken wings but I "only" had a regular pizza and no side orders.

On Friday morning when I woke up I gave myself a really good talking to and wrote a journal entry in my daily dieting diary exploring why I had over eaten and thinking about what I can do if the temptation strikes again. I realised that over the past few months there have been numerous times when I have been really tired, which can make me weepy and take things out of proportion, but that I have managed to not allow it to sabotage things by considering my goals and the reasons for why I want to be healthier and slimmer. So, I have put the following things in place:

1. I got myself a really beautiful notebook and this is going to be my new journal, which is not replacing my dieting diary, but will supplement it. I'm going to include pictures of myself at different stages, pictures of clothes I like and hairstyles etc and inspiring quotes and I'll write down compliments I have received etc. There will also be pictures of my grandchildren (or at least grandchild for now as the other two are not born yet) as one of my main reasons for slimming is to be a fit grandmother and I will put in anything else that inspires me. I can slip this in my bag and when I need motivation it will be there for me.

2. I am spending tomorrow cooking so I have lots of lovely meals ready and waiting so I don't have to cook if I am tired (my excuse for having the pizza)

3. I have persuaded my sister-in-law who lives 2 doors away from me that we should go for a walk every evening

4. I'm going to try meditation to see if that will help the insomnia

5. I'm going to plan all my meals for the next week - I've never done this before as I have always resisted the idea of not being spontaneous, but I think it might be really helpful and if it works then I shouldn't have the excuse to make bad choices.

Pleased to say that both Friday and Saturday were better days and on the plus side I have exercised 6 days out of the last 7.